My Scribles

A little boy was doing his maths homework. He said to himself, "Two plus five, the son of a b!tch is seven. Three plus six, the son of a b!tch is nine..." His mother heard what he was saying and gasped, "What are you doing?" The little boy answered, "I'm doing my maths homework, Mom." " And this is how your teacher taught you to do it?" the mother asked. "Yes," he answered. Infuriated, the mother asked the teacher the next day, "What are you teaching my son in maths?" The teacher replied, "Right now, we are learning addition." The mother asked, "And are you teaching them to say two plus two, the Son Of a b!tch is four?" After the teacher stopped laughing, she answered, "What I taught them was, two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH, is four."

Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock. To Err is human, to forgive is not a COMPANY policy. The road to success??.. Is always under construction. Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but if you think again, neither does Milk. In order to get a Loan, you first need to prove that you don't need it. All the desirable things in life are either illegal, expensive,fattening or married to someone else. Since Light travels faster than Sound, people appear brighter before you hear them speak. Everyone has a scheme of getting rich?.. Which never works. If at first you don't succeed?. Destroy all evidence that you ever tried. You can never determine which side of the bread to butter. If it falls down, it will always land on the buttered side. Anything dropped on the floor will roll over to the most inaccessible corner. As soon as you mention something : if it is good, it is taken?. If it is bad, it happens. He who has the gold,...

A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She reduced altitude and spotted a man below. She descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me Sir, can you help me? I promised a friend, I would meet him an hour ago but I don't know where I am." The man below replied, "You're in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude." ''You must be an engineer," said the lady balloonist. "I am", replied the man. 'How did you know?' ''Well", answered the lady in the balloon, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help to me at all. If anything, you've delayed my trip even more." The engineer below responded, "You must be in Top Management." ''I ...

The following power steps structure your thinking to make sure the actions you take will drive you towards success. Power Step #1: Be In Charge Of Your Life Caring what other people think of you puts them in charge of your life, instead of you. 'What will other people think of me?' slavery is extremely common. Most of us are brought up (rightfully so) to consider others. But, unless we are discerning, we soon find ourselves caught up in a job we can't stand, or living in a relationship which makes us unhappy, or getting caught up in the spiral of poverty. 'Trying to please other people all the time' syndrome begins in childhood. It stems from a desire to be liked and admired. Let's look at a fairly typical scenario: three boys, Fred, Joe, and Matthew, all five years old, are best pals. They fight to sit together at school and spend their breaks in a group. Fred comes to school one day with a stack of pokemon cards to show his friends. Joe is envious of Fred'...

സൂപ്പര്‍ താരങ്ങള്‍ക്ക് പണി കിട്ടി. ആരാണു കഥയിലെ വില്ലന്‍ എന്നറിയാന്‍ ക്ലൈമാക്സ് വരെ കാത്തിരിക്കണം. സൂപ്പര്‍ താരങ്ങളായതിനാല്‍ ഡബ്‌ള്‍ ക്ലൈമാക്സിനുള്ള സാധ്യതയും തള്ളിക്കളയാനാവില്ല. ഈ കഥയില്‍ വില്ലനാവാന്‍ മാത്രം മിടുക്കുള്ള ഒരു യുവനായകനും മലയാളത്തിലില്ല എന്നിരിക്കെ പൊതുജനങ്ങളുടെ സംശയങ്ങള്‍ നിര്‍മ്മാതാക്കളിലേക്കും അവരുടെ സംഘടനകളിലേക്കും നീങ്ങിയാല്‍ ആരും അത്ഭുതപ്പെടേണ്ട. ഒന്നരക്കോടി രൂപ ശമ്പളം വാങ്ങുന്ന ഏതൊരാള്‍ക്കും അതിന്റെയൊരു ഭാഗം പലരും കയ്യിട്ടുവാരുന്ന നികുതിപ്പെട്ടിയിലേക്ക് നിക്ഷേപിക്കാന്‍ മടിയുണ്ടാകും, അയാള്‍ മനുഷ്യനായിരിക്കുന്ന കാലത്തോളം. ഇനി, ആദായ നികുതി ഡയറക്ടറുടെ വരവില്‍ കവിഞ്ഞ സ്വത്തിനെക്കുറിച്ച് ഒരന്വേഷണം നടത്തിയാല്‍ അദ്ദേഹവും ഇത്തരത്തില്‍ മനുഷ്യന്‍ തന്നെയണെന്നു നമുക്കുറപ്പിക്കാന്‍ കഴിഞ്ഞേക്കും. താരപദവി ഇല്ലാത്ത എത്രയോ മനുഷ്യന്‍‌മാരുടെ നികുതി വെട്ടിപ്പിന്റെ കഥകളാണ് നമ്മളൊക്കെ അറിയാതെ പോയിട്ടുണ്ടാവുക. അതൊക്കെ പത്രമാധ്യമങ്ങളില്‍ വരാതെ ഒതുക്കാന്‍ മാത്രം എത്രരൂപയുടെ വരവില്‍ കവിഞ്ഞ സ്വത്ത് ആരൊക്കെ സമ്പാദിച്ചിട്ടുണ്ടാകും! അപ്പോ ഒതുക്കലിനാണു കാശ്. മമ്മുട്ടിയും മോഹന്‍ലാലും വരവില്‍ കവിഞ്...

A child was asked to write a book report on the entire Bible. This is amazing and brought tears of laughter to my eyes. I wonder how often we take for granted that children understand what we are teaching??? Through the eyes of a child: The Children's Bible in a Nutshell In the beginning, which occurred near the start, there was nothing but God, darkness, and some gas. The Bible says, 'The Lord thy God is one', but I think He must be a lot older than that. Anyway, God said, 'Give me a light!' and someone did. Then God made the world. He split the Adam and made Eve. Adam and Eve were naked, but they weren't embarrassed because mirrors hadn't been invented yet. Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating one bad apple, so they were driven from the Garden of Eden.....Not sure what they were driven in though, because they didn't have cars. Adam and Eve had a son, Cain, who hated his brother as long as he was Abel. Pretty soon all of the early people died off, excep...

NEW DELHI: Former telecom minister A Raja on Monday defended himself against corruption charges in the 2G scam, saying he had not done anything wrong and was merely following the policies pursued by his predecessors and the NDA government. Raja said that the sale of equity by Swan and Unitech to foreign companies was to attract FDI, nothing wrong as per corporate law. Dragging the Prime Minister into the 2G mess, Raja claimed that the finance minister had said that the sale of equity is not illegal adding that he said this in presence of PM and let the PM deny it. The 47-year-old DMK MP pleaded before Special CBI Judge OP Saini that there was nothing wrong in his decision of not auctioning 2G spectrum as he had "implemented only what I have inherited." Senior advocate Sushil Kumar, appearing for Raja, said if Raja is being prosecuted for following a certain policy then all Telecom ministers since 1993 are liable to be prosecuted as they too followed the same policy. "If ...